Tumblr?

I have decided to relocate my blog domain to tumblr for a various amount of reasons. I have no idea how this transition will go but am excited about trying something new. You can go to the "old blog" at the link above, but stay tuned for upcoming news at the new site!

http://thestarksfam.tumblr.com/

Family Fun

Family night at Christmas time is so much fun! Last night we built our very own Ginger Bread house. Between Jordan and Carter eating all the candy, we were able to decorate quite the home made of sweets. If this was real wouldn't our little Carter man be in heaven?

Here are a few shots of our creation:

He's excited to start!

Fun stuff!

I'm very concentrated...

So are the boys.

Candy!

Perfect size hands for this :)

He did such a good job!

He is so proud!

 We completed our evening with some apple pie a la mode and the movie Polar Express. It was such a special time spent as a family, this is definitely one tradition we will continue in our family year after year.

Carter has a Big Heart

My son, is so very sweet. He has the biggest heart for others and it just makes mine melt. Of course, he is three. So if you are reading this and are wondering what the heck I am talking about- I understand :) But he really does know how to love and he shares it with others. I'm so proud of him.

The other day Jordan was out in the living room. Carter was playing in his room for "quiet time" because he doesn't really nap anymore. He ran out to the living room and said, "Daddy come here! I made something for you!" Jordan went into the room and this is what Carter made for his Daddy:

Isn't he so sweet? Love that boy!

Holding a Heavy Heart

Today is December 10th. Just another day, right? The 10th.

Well it is to most. To most people, the tenth is just another day-perhaps a birthday or anniversary. The tenth used to be just an ordinary day to me. Now, it carries such a deeper meaning. On June 10th, my best friend passed away, my Grandma. Well, that was in June...so what's the problem? It is now December. A different month, season even. Sometimes I don't even realize when it's the tenth, other days it hits me when I say, "What's the date today?" Other days, I know as soon as I wake up, making it hard for me to roll out of bed.

I realized earlier this week that Friday was the 10th of December. June, July, August, September, October, November, and December. Six months. Six entire months of empty living without someone who means the world to me. I realized that my heart was feeling so heavy and so hurt I didn't know what was holding it up anymore. It literally hurts some days. Hurts. One of my organs is in pain. I just miss her so much.

I feel really hung up on the date this week, more than usual. Because I realized it's been half of a year since I last had my Grandma. What's so hard about this for me is not that it has been 6 long months...it doesn't feel like that to me. It feels like she's vacationing in Florida. Like it's been a few weeks but she'll be home any day so I can call. Like when I get a free day I can head over and go spend a day with her. And I can't. And I haven't been able to for quite some time now. It's making my heart heavy.

Now talk about my number one most depressing blog of all time, I know...and I'm sorry. I just want to say that we aren't promised good health or another day on this earth. Recently I've had so patients my age- 23- suffer from unbelievable accidents and who have gone through suffering, whose families have had to suffer. Whose families may not have spent enough time with their loved one, who got in a fight before they became ill, who let selfish desires get in the way of putting their family and loved ones first. It just makes you think.

I'm not saying I did this with my Grandma. I do regret every day being in nursing school when she got sick, I hate it. But she didn't. She was so proud of me. But I do know that in the past I haven't always put family first and I know others that have done the same. So many other things can get in the way-selfishness, annoyance, hurt, jealousy, etc.

I just encourage you if you don't already, don't take your family or your time here on earth for granted. Suck up every minute of it with your loved ones. Seriously-live today so that you'll have nothing to regret tomorrow. I know this all sounds so cliche/corny/whatever, but just love each other. Take time to build up friendships and relationships with family. Some people don't have that at all, so if you do-realize how blessed you really are.

Oh Christmas Tree ~ Oh Christmas Tree!

Our apartment is all decked out for Christmas (to the best of its ability). And I don't mean to brag but can I just say that I love our Christmas tree? It makes it so much cozier in our home and don't get me started on how much I love staring at the lights. I could stare forever!

Sidenote: Notice Max has taken his spot under the tree. He thinks the bulbs are his toys and he is constantly chewing at the branches. Drives me CRAZY :) He is becoming good friends with the spray bottle once again.

The most exciting thing to me though is getting ornaments throughout the years that Carter has made or ornaments that we acquire that are sentimental to us- we have an "engaged" one, an "our first christmas" one that the lovely Christy bought us as a gift, or my "nurse" one. We just put up the first one that Carter made. It just means so much to me. I love our tree because it will be special and full of memories.

This is Carter's tree that Mema got him last year. As you can see he likes to decorate one side only. He is very proud :) 

And last but not least...the nativity. We received this as a wedding gift and I absolutely LOVE my Willow Tree Nativity. It is my favorite thing (second to my beautiful tree of course). I am excited to share the story of Christmas with Carter again this year because he is able to understand it more now, it is so wonderful to watch him learn about Jesus...just another reason why I love Christmas.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas...

Why, Hello Everyone!

Yes...we are still alive and well here in Clarkston! I almost forgot I had a blog until I read my sister-in-law Lindsay's post. So she has inspired a new post! So much has happened since the last time I blogged.

For example:

1. I am a married woman

2. I moved to a new city

3. I have a new home, with a new roommate 

4. I am not in nursing school

5. I am involved in a ministry I am absolutely passionate about-reaching the youth of our generation

6. I am an actual RN (a "real nurse" as Jordan would say)

7. I have a job in the IICU which I am loving so far

8. The holidays are happening, now with my new family

Wow! That seems like quite a lot to blog about, don't you think?

So I am obviously not going to blog about all the happenings in the Starks family. But wanted to let you all know that God has blessed us over and abundantly and we miss all of you reading very much.

It's also December 1st. Which means, it's pretty much my favorite time of year...minus the cold, the snow, and the busy malls. So basically, I only like the holiday-Christmas!!! I am so excited to be sharing this time of year with my husband and son. It's our first "Starks" Christmas together and I cannot wait. I am already thinking of the traditions I would like to begin in our family and the things I would like to continue from other generations. We now have our very first Christmas tree, it is all up and decorated and it looks wonderful if I do say so myself! The rest of the apartment is a bit lacking in the Christmas decoration department but it just makes it more special to build up the collection over the years to come. 

Thanksgiving and Christmas are so special, the time with family is just priceless. We were able to enjoy a wonderful Thanksgiving with both sides of the family last week. This year is full of adjustments in the holiday department. It's tough as a newlywed making time for both families. Who would have thought, right? I also have the luxury of working the holidays from now on, which will take some getting used to. And of course, the hardest adjustment, is having to spend the holiday without the people we love. 

Thanksgiving and Christmas were my Grandma's absolute favorite holidays. I don't think there was another time of year where she was happier. She loved to cook and have family together, hence the love for Thanksgiving. She also was the world's best shopper-she loved to shop, mostly for others. She was the most giving person I've ever known, so Christmas time was a lot of fun for her. She LOVED giving people gifts. Her house was decorated beautifully with a tree in literally almost every room. That is a lot of trees...that were perfectly decorated. Just gorgeous. If you weren't feeling "christmasy" before going to her house you couldn't really help it when you were there. And I definitely didn't forget all of the Christmas cookies and treats that were always on the kitchen counter at this time of year. Peanut Butter Blossoms, anyone? Yum. Oh how Christmas won't be the same this year, but hopefully I can make Christmas as special for Jordan & Carter as she always did for me. 

So those are the happenings in our life at the moment. Happy December everyone!

Consider this the "Before"...

So this Saturday we moved our stuff into our new home :) I am so grateful to everyone that was able to help us get in and all settled!!! Thank you soo very much! We couldn't have done it without you.

So I literally packed just about everything on Friday afternoon and then we moved it down Saturday and the apartment was organized by Saturday night. It's not quite there yet but it is as "homey" as it is going to get for now until we are able to get a few more things, paint, hang pictures, etc. So not quite done yet but here is a sneak peak of what we have so far:

Living Room

Master Bedroom

Carter's Room

So there it is. As you can see, it needs a personal touch but this was just at the end of unpacking on Saturday. We are going to paint, hang pictures, etc. It's going to be a cozy little home and we just love it! Just a few short weeks and we'll be living there as a family. CAN'T WAIT! :)

After moving...woo!

I DID IT!!!!

To the very few readers that I have :),

So I did something very crazy and I am so glad I did. I took my final exams early and completed RN school today!!! Words cannot describe the accomplishment I feel and how thrilled I am to be done and be myself again. I just thought I'd let everyone know about this exciting time in my life. Now all I have to do is pass my state boards...so studying isn't gone for good...but school certainly is!

WOO HOO!!!!

A HUGE thank you to everyone who has been there to support me through this challenging time and who has put up with me :) I appreciate it more than you know! Could NEVER have done this without you.

"So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised." Hebrews 10:35-36 (NIV)

Wow, where did the time go?

So just a little refresher for you:

in just 2 days, Jordan and I will get the keys to our new place

in 6 days I will be "done" with nursing school

in 37 days I will be getting married

I cannot express how excited I am to be finishing nursing school soon. This time next week I won't have to be studying (for anything except boards, that is)!!! WOO HOO!

I can't wait to get unpacked in our new home and then have a month to plan our wedding and start our new life together.

How exciting! Now, studying for the day-not too many more of these.

God is SO good!!!

So the youth are at camp this week...without me :( Boo! So I have been a big baby about that. Only because I know how much fun and life-changing camp is!!! And let me tell you, it has been life changing for them already and it's only day 2! One of the students dedicated his life to the Lord tonight, many of them have been filled with the Holy Spirit, and they are having a BLAST! I can't wait to hear more of what God is going to do in these young people's lives! He is so good!!! I am bummed I am not there to share in the excitement with them but I am soooooo excited here at home :) Miss all my girls (and guys too)!

So if you follow, please pray for the Ignite students this week. I pray that they would be receptive to whatever God has in store for them this week and the many ahead. I pray that they would have softened and open hearts to Him. That they would step out of their comfort zone and give EVERYTHING they have and are to God! I pray that this week would be LIFE CHANGING. That they will remember Camp 2010 as the summer that changed their spiritual walk. I pray for passion in their lives! I pray that He would become priority above all else! That this would be carried back to Clarkston with them and would spread like crazy! I pray for something beyond what I can ever think and imagine for them. I pray that not one student would come home without a touch from God. AMEN!

Please pray for them any time you think of them this week! Glory to God!

Just what I needed...

God's Will for me to Grieve

His place for me

It's been awhile since I've posted. Mostly because all of the crazy things that life brings. But this morning I just needed a place to "vent" I guess...

Sometimes I just have so much on my plate that it overwhelms me, it feels like it just keeps overflowing to effect every area of my life. I feel like no one really understands. If only I could do the things that are most important to me all the time and spend time with the people I love whenever I want, wouldn't that be perfect? There are only a few more weeks of the craziness of school. But then there is wedding planning and moving. Then there are my RN boards. Then I'm sure there is something else. There is always something! I just wish that I could do what I want to be doing these few short weeks before moving...

Lately I have just felt especially alone and left out. Not a fun feeling to have, that's for sure. I just become so frustrated with the situation in general and I continually let it bother me. Today I was reading and I came across this verse,

2 Chronicles 6:2-"I have surely built You an exalted house, and a place for You to dwell in forever.”

The Lord has a place for me in His house, He has promised that to me in His word. And I know I should have comfort in that. I am valuable to Him and He loves me so much.

Psalm 147:3-"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."

For any of you reading, if you would just pray for me. It really does hurt to be the one not included or to feel like no one is there and I know that God hears my cries and that someday I will be right where He wants me, right "at home".  Please just pray that God would comfort me, that He would help me to find that place where I "belong", that He would bring me those friends & family that are "there" and that accept me for who I am, that He would bring me unconditional love. I thank Him for those that He has given me and for the love and acceptance that He continually shows me day in and day out, I certainly don't deserve it. Thank you Lord!

He is saving me...

2 weeks ago, my Grandma passed away. She was like a Mom & a Grandma combined (the best combination) and she was my very best friend. I miss her more than words can express. Love you Gram! 

You know, I've really been holding it all together pretty well. God has truly given me more peace and comfort than I could have ever imagined. For that, I am truly thankful. But for some reason, it still doesn't replace the huge void I feel in my heart. I miss her so much and I know that's never going to go away. But what is hurting me the most right now-and maybe it will change with time, maybe not-is that I  lost my very best friend. She was the one who I called every day. She was the one who I called with accomplishments, excitement, laughter, and tears. I called her for every little thing that happened in my life, and every big thing as well. She was the one that I would go spend the weekend with, instead of going out with friends. She was the best shopping buddy and she loved going out to eat (as do I)! Who do I do those things with now? I just feel so lost. I know there isn't anyone that will ever replace her, there never will be. But it felt so good to know that I had the best friend I could have ever asked for...but the loneliness and emptiness I feel now doesn't feel as good.

Last night, I was really feeling sorry for myself. I haven't really done that yet. But I am just really feeling lonesome, it sucks not having a really great friend to rely on. Then I realized, all this emptiness and hurt that I'm feeling...why can't God be that for me? As I was praying and pouring out my heart to Him, it just hit me that-God wants to be my best friend. Maybe if I let him fill the void I'm feeling, the emptiness, maybe I can deepen and find a new aspect of our relationship. He has been the one that has listened to me cry, listened to my anger, my fears. He has comforted me, given me peace and strength. He truly is all I need. And maybe He is all I need in a friend too. 

On my way home I heard this song by Josh Wilson. Wow, does it ever apply to me right now:

Savior, please take my hand
I work so hard, I live so fast
This life begins, and then it ends
And I do the best that I can, but I don't know how long I'll last


I try to be so tough
But I'm just not strong enough
I can't do this alone, God I need You to hold on to me
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love
Savior, please keep saving me

Savior, please help me stand
I fall so hard, I fade so fast
Will You begin right where I endAnd be the God of all I am because You're all I have

Hallelujah
Everything You are to me
Is everything I'll ever need
And I am learning to believe
That I don't have to prove a thing
'Cause You're the one who's saving me

God-please save me. Please carry me through these next few months. Please help me remember You are all I need. Thank you, Lord! 

I miss you Grandma, so very much. I wish you were here. Love you! 

I LOVE finding new worship songs!

I heard this song on my way to clinical this morning. What a blessing it was to me! Please listen, it's most definitely worth it! Our God really is amazing, I love Him so much.

A new fav for sure!

Distractions, Distractions

I am a very distractable person. If I'm supposed to be doing something-whether it be studying, cleaning, wedding, etc. it's not hard to pull me away from the task. It's no surprise to anyone how busy I am at the moment. This summer is going to be the biggest whirlwind of my life. Sometimes, I forget to breathe. Now, I don't think everyone understands how busy I actually am. I don't care to explain it either because you still probably wouldn't :) But let's just say the last thing I should be doing is a) blogging b) making a silly inspiration board c) be on the internet period.

But, nonetheless...well after midnight this is what consumes my time. Nothing productive. I love doing inspiration boards, you would think that I would do them in relation to my wedding...but no. For some reason, with only 3 months to go...I still have not hit my wedding planning overhaul yet. In fact, I have so much to do that I should be screaming or crying at this point. But I simply just think it's going to get done itself apparently. So last night...with my to do list glaring at me, this is what I did for fun. Not studying or wedding planning, not getting my ginormous to-do list done. But dreaming of what my apartment is going to look like :) Stylemepretty.com has the best inspiration board planner ever! So this is what I came up with:




I so cannot wait to be married and moved into our new home :) It's going to be wonderful and I am so very excited!!!


3 months and counting <3

Attitude

I read a quote today that said:

"Life is 10% what happens and 90% how you react to it."

I've heard it before but it hasn't ever struck me like it did today. I really need to remember this in my life each and every day.

Here is to taking control of my reactions! What a positive outlook on life :)

PS- The countdown has officially begun. There are 100 days until I am Mrs. Jordan Starks!!!

Big News :)

We have some news for everyone. It is HUGE news. Exciting news. Not to mention, very important news!

For those of you that didn't know, we have been interning at Harvestland Church in Clarkston, MI since April. IGNITE Youth is our favorite part of the week. We love it. We love the church, we love the people, and most of all...we love the students there. We feel right at home.

As you all know, Jordan and I are getting married September 3rd, 2010! We are OH SO excited. With only 101 days left, we have been looking at places to live, job opportunities, etc. to prepare for our new life as a family this Fall.

Our internship opportunity at the church had no timeline. It was start date to whenever we feel "done" at the church. No pressure, right? :) Well...after getting to know these students and just feeling more and more at peace with the calling that God has for us, we just didn't feel like leaving at the end of the summer or when we get married was what God had.

Thankfully, neither did the board :)

So the BIG NEWS is:

We have been extended the opportunity to be on staff at Harvestland Church! We will be leading the Youth there through the rest of this summer as planned...and after we get married in the Fall! Moving plans are in motion and we have found a place to live there! Just ironing out the small details.

We are moving.
We are going to be Youth Pastors!
We are getting married.
I am graduating in August, taking boards, ***hopefully*** finding a job as a RN!

Moving.
Youth Pastors.
Marriage.
Graduation.

Moved, Youth Pastors, Married!, Job

AHHHHHH THIS IS SO EXCITING! :) 

E-pics

As always, Captured Photography, has done it again. We had our engagement photo session last week & had a blast! For those of you that know me, know that I hate getting my picture taken. So it was quite the struggle for me to be comfortable taking these pics but somehow they were able to make them look amazing and really capture the essence of Jordan & I's relationship. To look at our E-pic preview, click here. Enjoy!

Thank you CP for making these photos so very special to us, you guys are such a blessing!

Deuteronomy 31:8

"The LORD himself goes before you and will be with
 you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do
 not be afraid; do not be discouraged." (NIV)

What Carter loves about his Mom...

So I received a message from Carter's teacher earlier this week. Of course, Mother's Day is coming up and being the good teacher that she is she has been talking about Mother's Day at school. When in circle time she asked all of the kids what they loved about their Mom. When leading the discussion she was getting the kids to think of some things that their Moms do for them. Some said they love how she plays with them, how she takes them to the zoo, or makes their favorite pancakes. Do you know what my Carter said? 

"My Mom spanks me." 

 As always Carter, thank you for your kind words at school and for making me look like such a good Mommy :)

Max

So after much debate, we finally named our kitty. His name is Max. He has been such a sweet new addition to our family! He has been so playful and chill! He is the perfect kitten. He is still adjusting to his new home. We get a hiss here and there when we get him out from his hiding places, but he is getting more comfortable with us. He is currently playing with my hands as I type this. He's so much fun :)

Here are some new family pics:

Updates

Ignite
So I am pleased to announce that our first evening at Ignite was so much fun! I really really really enjoyed myself and know that Jordan did too. We have a really great group of kids and I am so excited to get to know each and every one of them! We are already so looking forward to seeing everyone next week :) Thank you to everyone for your prayers, God has definitely blessed us with this opportunity to minister and we are excited for what the future holds for these students!!!

New addition to the future Starks clan
We have a new family member!!! We got the most precious little kitten you could ever even imagine. He is so sweet and we love him so very much already. We brought him home last night, and he had a really good first night at home. Then tonight we brought Carter over to Jordan's apartment to meet his new kitty! (This is his birthday present...a little early). He LOVED it! Oh my goodness, it was the most precious thing to watch him with "his kitty" all night long. Adorable. It was quite the battle getting the little kitten home because Jordan was not a fan. But now, Jordan loves it probably more than all of us, go figure! We do not yet have a name for our lil' guy because I was dead set on letting Carter name him...but he want's to name it "Ellie the Camel" after the song "Sally the Camel" he learned at school. Well...Jordan refuses to call the "manly" cat a girl name...so we tried to convince Carter he was a boy kitty and he said he wanted to name him "Boy". Which Jordan also refused. So we will be announcing his name shortly. He is very picky with the suggested names but really does love the name "Ellie". Too cute. Here are some pictures that the awesome family that saved him posted of him, I will post more of ours later:

He is the gray tiger striped one on the right :)

So cute!

We love him so much already!!! 

One semester left until Graduation!!!!!!!!!
The most exciting thing of all is that I just finished my semester today and I only have one semester left until I graduate! This semester will probably the most challenging yet, but I can't wait to be done! Woo hoo! So close!

Prayer Request

Hello all!

I'm just writing a quick note to all of you who follow :)

Jordan and I start at Harvestland next Sunday, April 18th @ 6pm doing the youth service there! We are so very excited to see what God is going to do there and we can't wait to get started!

If you would be willing, we would really love and appreciate any prayers especially during this upcoming week and throughout our time there. We are both very new to youth ministry and are going into this expecting something from God but we have no clue what exactly to expect ourselves ;) We would so greatly appreciate prayer support during this exciting time!

My prayer is that God would prepare Jordan & I's hearts to serve these young people. That He would use us, annoint us, and that everything we do there would be of Him. That we would hear from Him on what we are supposed to do in this group. That the Spirit would move in these youth meetings each and every week. I pray that He would prepare the hearts of these young people that are already so faithful in being involved in the group and also for the future youth that will be coming there. I pray that He would help us build a foundation in this core group, that relationships would be built with them. I pray that He would give us the wisdom, guidance, and preparation that we need and that He would also continue to work in us to cultivate our relationship with Him so that we can be transparent and better serve others.

We are so thankful, Lord!

Thank you to all who are so supportive of this! We love you and will be keeping you updated!

"SPIDERS ON YOUR HEAD!"

So Carter just woke up from his sleep...crying. I try to avoid my natural maternal instinct to rush to his "rescue" and see if he'll fall back asleep (very unlike me). No such luck. I finally go in there to see what all the fuss is about and with snot all over his face he says,

"I just want to eat all my easter eggs!!!"

I of course am annoyed that this is why he is throwing such a fit. I tell him that he can play with them tomorrow and to go back to sleep.

"But MOM! I just wanted to lay with my Mommmmmyyyy!"

Okay. Let me clarify something-I do NOT get called Mommy anymore. It's Mom. Or even Jess if he pleases from time to time. Not Mommy. So this melts my heart.

"Mommy please can I come and lay with you. I want to sleep with you. Please."

Well what do you think I did? Gave in of course! So I carry him and his blanket and his "bubba" and his snot soaked pillow into my room. In my bed. Where I was so happily enjoying a book-that wasn't even a text book! Ugh. The joys of motherhood-2 nights in a row might I add.

Now don't let me fool you, I absolutely adore sleeping with Carter. He cuddles and kisses and loves on me in between the kicking and yelling at me to scoot over and talking in his sleep. But I really do enjoy it-no sarcasm there.

So I'm all ready to cuddle him and sleep next to my baby and just as I start to relax...

SCREEEEEEEEEEECHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

I jump up, startled of course. He did in fact, just scream in my ear and possibly damaged my ear drum.  I ask what's wrong?!

"A SPIDER JUST BIT ME ON THE FINGER! IT HURTS SO BAD MOM! HE BIT ME HARD! THERE IS A SPIDER!!!"

First of all, I am deathly afraid of spiders. Fortunately, I have done everything I can to hide this fear from Carter so I don't pass it on to him (or so I thought). Somewhat similar to how my Mom did for me :) So I am freaking out! Where the heck is the spider!?! I don't even want to get back in my bed...I inspect him, his fingers, the bed. And what does my little drama queen do? As I inspect his finger...

His entire body quivers. "Don't touch me Mom! A SPIDER just bit my finger!"

Whatever. There is no spider (at least I seriously hope not). I calm him down and try to get him to sleep. So as I think he's finally sleeping-

Another scream.

Ants! They apparently are everywhere and he cannot sleep with ants in the bed. Seriously? GO TO BED!

Wakes up in tears. Real ones. Tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Mom, there is a spider! ON YOUR SHIRT! LOOK MOM, IT'S ON YOUR SHIRT!!!" 

Freaky!!! There wasn't one, thankfully. I discovered this after jumping and squirming about inspecting my shirt. Next you ask? A butterfly. There is a butterfly in the bed. I had had enough creepy crawlies in my bed for one night. So I asked Carter if there were bugs in his bed.

"No. Just yours Mom."

And I even changed my sheets today! There couldn't possibly be bug infestation quite yet. Oh well...

Off to Carter's bed we go-where it is bug free! After new socks, prayer, and convincing him that there were no ants in his bed-he is sound asleep. For now. Hopefully I didn't just waste the little time  of peace on blogging and not sleeping :) Good night! 

 

 

 

 

Easter Festivities!

Such an awesome night with such an amazing boy!

He found more eggs!

So proud of his easter eggs :)

Where You Go I Go

 ¹As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.²Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. ³Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. ⁴There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called— ⁵one Lord, one faith, one baptism; ⁶one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

Ephesians 4:1-6

My prayer today is that though I may struggle when God gives me a new role, that He would help me to submit to the calling He has for me. That I would be able to live my life each day according to His will and His calling on my life. That He would continue to open my eyes to see which direction He has for me. That I would be more humble, gentle, patient, loving, and forgiving. That myself and others would know that we serve ONE God-who is Father of all things-He is in all, over all, and through everything that we do. Thank you God!!! 

This passage was such a good one this morning! I just desire to go where God wants for me and do what God wants for me. I want to continue to grow in Him each and every day and just want to glorify Him in everything that I do. 

Thank you Lord, for being there in everything that goes on in our lives. For leading us and guiding us in the direction of your calling so faithfully. For loving us no matter what and for your grace. You truly are an awesome God! I love you Lord!

Ignite!!!

Sooo...I've waited too long to blog about this because we have been SO EXCITED! There has just not been time to sit down and spill :) So to all of you waiting patiently-here...you...go!

The exciting news is...

Dun Dun Dunnn:

Jordan & I recently accepted a youth internship at Harvestland Open Bible Church in Clarkston, MI. We will be doing the youth service there every Sunday night starting April 18th until ??? We are going to do this internship until we feel God is telling us otherwise! The youth group is called "Ignite"-hence the blog title. They are a growing youth group and they have just recently moved services to Sunday nights which is amazing because that works perfectly into our schedule. God works out all the little details, doesn't He? So we are so extremely excited that God has provided us with this opportunity and we CANNOT WAIT to start working with the youth there.

Everything has happened so extremely fast...it's crazy! We received confirmation that ministry was what God had for Jordan and I, we accepted it, and prayed for God to open the right doors. And guess what? HE DID! And he did it sooner rather than later. It just goes to show how faithful and how awesome our God is! He reveals everything perfectly in His timing and this is what He has for us right now and we are so blessed to be apart of it :)

So please keep Jordan and I in your prayers as we start this new journey into youth ministry. We are nervous and excited all at the same time so we shall see what God has in store at Harvestland! WOO HOO!

 I Thessalonians 5:24 says, "He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it."

Mouthy much?

So yesterday morning after getting up with Carter, making him breakfast, and watching his morning cartoons with him I decided that I was keeping him home from school so that we could have a "Mommy & Carter Day". Now, those of you that know me know that my schedule sadly hasn't allowed for very many of these lately so I was very excited! So I called to let preschool know and it was official...I had him all to myself for the day :)

It was a wonderful day-we had so much fun. I was just enjoying him and all the things that 2 year olds bring to a Mom's life. Until about Noon-ish. Carter wanted a grilled cheese sandwich so I made him one, cut it into the shapes he wanted, got him his favorite "chocolate nilk" and we were enjoying our lunch together. Now I like to dip my grilled cheese in ketchup-so of course I passed that trait along to my son. So he too, likes do dip his grilled cheese into ketchup (along with just about everything else). So as he dipped his sandwich into the ketchup he got some on his cheek. The rest of the story goes something like this:

Carter: Mom, I need a napkin.
Me: Okay sweetie, let me get one for you. (Proceed to get him a napkin and hand it to him).
Carter: Mom! This is NOT a napkin.
Me: Yes it is Carter, wipe your face.
Carter: NO!!! Throws the napkin and slams his plate on the table.
Me: (Very firmly) Carter-we do not act that way! You don't tell Mommy "No" and you don't slam things down. That is not nice behavior. ( I get up and start doing the dishes from lunch).
Carter: (About 2 minutes later) MOM! YOU DON'T TALK TO CARTER THAT WAY!!! (With his finger pointed at me).
Me: Excuse me? What did you say?
Carter: Repeats above.
Me: Talk to you what way?
Carter: MEAN!
Me: Carter, YOU don't talk to ME that way! You go sit in time out RIGHT NOW!
(He goes over to time out and has a seat. As I sit him down he looks at me and as plain as day says...)
Carter: Mom, it's okay. I forgive you.
Me: (Silently to myself) ARE YOU KIDDING ME? HE FORGIVES ME??? WHAT A LITTLE BRAT! HOW DARE HE?! UGH! What am I supposed to say to that? Who does he think he is?
(Aloud) UGHH! Carter, Mommy won't say she is sorry for disciplining you...blah blah blah blah (don't even remember). All I know is that I was arguing with my 2 year old. Arguing with him. Really? Who does that? So I just trailed off saying who knows what in the kitchen as I finished the dishes.

After time out I tell Carter that he needs to tell Mommy he's sorry for talking to her that way...

Carter: No, it's okay Mom. I don't.

Where do I go wrong? He'll be 3 at the end of May. What's he going to say when he's 6? Or 16? Sheesh! Lord help me!

Wedding Website!

Hey everyone,

So it's been awhile since I posted but I've been a busy girl-what's new right? But I got a free second this past weekend to finally work on our wedding website. So here it is:

http://www.mywedding.com/jordanandjessicastarks.


It's still quite the work in progress and some more things I would like to add, but I wanted everyone to get a peek at it-I thought it was pretty cute. More pictures, details, etc. to come. 


In other news, I got to see my Grandma this past weekend. (For those of you that don't know I am extremely close with her. She is an amazing woman and I love her so much. She was diagnosed with cancer last year and then fell and broke her hip in November-so it's been a rough year but God has been getting us through :) ). Anyway, she is doing well. She is getting around much better since she broke her hip-even going a little bit without the walker which is awesome! She has been getting up and around and using her exercise bike as well. She is working so hard :) She is still undergoing chemo treatments and we aren't sure how long those will be lasting but we are just praying for healing in her body!!! The cancer is still "stabilized". It is not growing but it is not shrinking either. But I'm believing in a miracle! It is so nice to get to spend time with her. I love it more than anything. Such a good weekend-weekends with her are the best! Please keep praying!!! Our God is one that heals and performs miracles! 


I'm on spring break by the way!!! WOO HOO! Still not sure why it's at the end of Feb. and why there is a bunch of snow on the ground, but I'll take what I can get. Still a busy week, trying to get a dent in wedding planning (hence the website)...but I'm getting there! I'll post soon! Enjoy the website!!!

You better be in bed!

Funny story: 


After we tucked Carter in tonight he sneaked out of bed and was laying by his door. We knew he was there but were ignoring him in hopes he would return to his bed...he did not. So he kept sighing really loudly to get our attention. Finally, Jordan said to me (loudly), "Mommy, did you know that all the little boys that aren't in bed get spankings?" Carter didn't budge. "I'm going to have to spank all the little boys named Carter that aren't in their beds." After a few rounds of this we didn't hear Carter move so Jordan said, "Okay, I'm going to go spank any little boy that isn't in his bed." Carter yells from his room, "DADDY! I AM IN MY BED!!!" with annoyance. Sure enough, there was Carter in his bed. 


So cute. 

Oh where to go from here...

So, as I said earlier in the week...there are some very new and exciting things happening in our life right now! Now brace yourselves, this was very unexpected so it may come as a big surprise to many of you reading!

Jordan and I went to a Winter Camp recently as youth leaders for our church's youth group. This group of kids are just so amazing and the leaders that are involved in this ministry are awesome!!! We were very blessed to be apart of such a life changing weekend, not only for the students-but for us as well.

While we were there-on the last night of service, Jordan had a word spoken over him by the speaker. In a nutshell-the word was that Jordan is called to ministry and has the gift of prophesy in his life. That the things God has for him in ministry are bigger than we can even think or imagine right now-but they will be fulfilled.

When we left I really didn't know what to think about it and neither did Jordan-he was just really excited and so was I! We didn't really get the chance to discuss it until we got home to Midland but in my mind, we would just really pray and actively seek what God has and if ministry is it then awesome! I also remembered that in the Bible it says that when a word is spoken over someone it will be confirmed two or three times. So I naturally thought 'well, we have at least one more time to hear this word from God for us to be sure that it was a legitimate word.' Of course, questioning if this really was something that God had for us. After getting home and talking with Jordan he really shared his heart with me on it. He said that he has had this word spoken over him before (not the gift of prophecy, but his call to ministry)-and that this was the third time. I wasn't all too familiar with the two times before, but it was never something that we really talked about pursuing in our life together-especially as a calling from God. So of course I was blown away, as was he, to get a word like this from the Lord a third time. 

Jordan feels, as do I, that this was a confirmation from God that he is supposed to be in full time ministry. With that being said, when God calls one he also calls his spouse. Being the lucky girl I am that gets to be me in September! In my heart, I've always felt like that my husband would be involved in ministry somehow-I just didn't know any details. With Jordan leading worship for the youth I just assumed this is what He had. But apparently He has much bigger things in store for us! I am up for anything that God has for us and I am just ecstatic to be going on this journey with him. 

So-not really knowing where God is going with this or where to go from here...we are just actively praying for God's guidance on what exactly He has called Jordan to do in the ministry, where He has called him to, and how he is going to get there. We would appreciate your prayers more than anything as this is a very exciting and overwhelming time. Obviously, this wasn't something we expected but we are seeking God's guidance and will with our whole hearts because we are willing to do whatever it is that He has for us. So if you would, please please please be praying for God's will to be made clear to us so that we only go in the direction that He has for us and that we would hear clearly from Him. 

Thank you all so much and we are just so thrilled to be as blessed as we are! We will definitely keep you posted on any new happenings! :) 

Goin' to the chapel and we're...

Gonna get married! Today is 7 months from the day I say "I do" to the man of my dreams. Can you believe it?

seven months


That is almost half of a year.

I cannot even begin to express how excited I am!!!

Also, in a blog coming later this week or next when I have longer than 5 minutes to sit down and breathe (it's been a crazy week-as will next week, but I'll find time), there are some really exciting things happening in our lives and I just ask for everyone's prayers for direction and guidance! More to come on that later...

 I'm off to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit today. A very hard place for me to be. Going to make it a good day anyway-no matter how sad I am. Have a great day everyone!

"Eptember Free"

AKA- "September 3" The day we are getting married.

Can I just say, that I think my son is the cutest little boy in the entire world? ( I know, I know-all moms think this...but Carter really is just so precious).

We've had wedding on the brain all day. We've been looking at which flights to book for our honeymoon and let me just tell you-I can NOT wait until I am married and on my honeymoon. I am so anxious and it seems like I have so long to go. I've heard it only gets worse, so this should be fun :)

So anyway, tonight Jordan and Carter were having a little chat. Jordan was asking Carter who was getting married? And Carter simply said, "Mommy!" So Jordan was explaining to Carter how when we get married, he will be here all the time-when Carter gets up, when he goes to bed, etc. So Carter was very excited to say the least. He is always asking when he gets up, "Where is Daddy? He's not at home. He's not at work. He's coming here. Etc." He told Carter that not only are Mommy and Daddy getting married-but Daddy and Carter were getting married too. Now Carter just thought that was the coolest thing.

When I came downstairs Carter ran into the living room and said, "Carter and Mommy and Daddy are gettin' MARRIED!" So precious. So here's a little clip of me asking Carter-"Who's getting married?"

Marriage Prep

So Jordan and I enjoyed our first marriage counseling session last night. I don't know if this is weird, but I'm actually really really excited to be counseled before we take this gigantically huge step into the rest of our lives. So not knowing what to really expect of marriage counseling, we go last night to meet with Kurt-our marriage counselor. After discussing life and our future marriage plans-Kurt says, "Well, I bet you guys didn't know this...but you are going to be taking a test today." So I've heard about my friends who have gotten married that have taken these tests-and I was actually hoping we would get to take one-but I didn't know I had to take this thing on our first day, right?

So after Kurt assures us that this test has no right or wrong answers and that it is just to show our strengths and our "areas of growth". Notice he didn't say weakness, he said-"areas of growth". He makes it sound so nice doesn't he?

So we get this test booklet and scantron. This is official-we get scantrons and #2 pencils. I open up this book...and it's 165 questions! I'm thinking, wow they should really have us all figured out by the time we're done. So we take this hugely long test and we finish it, turn it in. Phew! We survived.

But then I start thinking. And if you know me, you know that I'm an over-thinker. Of just about everything. So I'm like, "should I have answered that 'strongly agree' or just 'agree'? Because if I just say 'agree' does that imply that I'm too nonchalant about it? But then if I would have said 'strongly' doesn't that mean I'm overly opinionated?" Yep, this is what I think about after I take a test. Not for a grade, but to assess my relationship with Jordan. So what if I suck at my relationship with Jordan? Is it going to tell me? hahaha, I'm just kidding :) I was joking with Kurt asking, "So when we are done, is it going to give us a percentage of how compatible we are? Will you just have to tell us if it recommends we don't even proceed with the counseling?" :)

So maybe I'm a little paranoid to see where all my areas of weakness-ahem-"areas for growth" are. But I'm actually so incredibly excited to assess our relationship. It is going to be such a good insight on our current relationship and what areas we need to work on for our marriage. What a great opportunity marriage counseling is. To be able to hear wisdom from a pastor who will pray with you and over your future marriage, get insight to marriage itself, and truly be able to learn so much more about each other and grow in our relationship is just so awesome!

Makes me even more excited for the wedding! For those of you interested: only 226 more days!!!!